- May 27, 2016
You might think that money has nothing to do with romance, but you’re oh-so-wrong. According to a new study, published by Frontiers, who we decide to hook up with may have a whole load to do with how wealthy we feel. The research looked at Chinese couples in long-term relationships. In each couple, one person was made to think that they were ‘wealthy’ or ‘poor’. The researchers then looked at how the participants reacted to their partners to see whether this changed their behaviour.
“We remarked that wealthy men attach more importance to a mate’s physical attractiveness setting higher standards and preferring to engage in short-term mating than those who have less money. However, for committed women, money may lead to less variation in their mating strategies because losing a long-term relationship generally has a higher reproductive cost,” explained Professor Darius Chan from the Department of Psychology, at the University of Hong Kong.
So, this would suggest that wealthy men expect their partners to be more attractive, whereas women want to keep things stable when their guy’s got cash. The point is that money plays a role in every relationship whether we like it or not. We might want to play down this aspect of dating, but (consciously or subconsciously) we’re all aware of how our partner’s wallet affects us and our lives. What’s more, many couples find that money is one of the major things that causes them to fight. If that sounds a little familiar to you, you need to put a stop to your financial woes before it’s too late.
Of course, we all know that finances can affect our relationships. If either you or your partner earn more than one another, it can be hard to strike a balance. The last thing you want to do is cause a whole load of arguments simply because you can’t see eye-to-eye on your cash. If that’s a very real danger right about now, there are some oh-so-easy things that you might want to try.
One of the most important things you have to keep in mind is that you can’t ignore this issue. Sure, sweeping it swiftly under the rug might work in the short-term, but that’s not a particularly realistic solution. The truth of the matter is that you need to approach this thing head-on if you want to ensure that your relationship runs smoothly. Here are just 10 little things that you should try for yourself:
Argh. You knew that this one was coming your way, right? Talking will always be the first step in these situations, but that doesn’t mean that it’s going to be easy. Most people find it shockingly hard to chit-chat about money. You probably already know which of you earns more than the other, and so that’s not a conversation you need to have right now. Instead, talk about how your finances can stretch, what you’re comfortable spending, and how much you want to save.
So, why is this so very crucial? Well, you likely have different expectations when it comes to money, but you’ve never spelt that out to one another. For example, one of you might think nothing of dropping £100 on a night out, whereas the other may want to spend more like £20. If you know about that before you hit the town, you can deal with it ahead of time and skip the nasty argument.
Bills can often be a source of friction for couples. If you happen to live with your partner, you will have likely argued about this one a few too many times. Here’s the thing: Bills should always be split evenly. It doesn’t matter if one of your earns more than the other, it doesn’t matter who uses the heating the most, and it doesn’t matter if you think otherwise. When two people share a home, they share the burden of the bills. It’s that simple. You can use an app like The Divvy App to split your bills right down the middle every time.
Download: The Divvy App
Sorry, but no one said that this was going to be easy. If you want to quit overspending on household items, you absolutely need to make a budget sooner rather than later. Splitting up the cost of things such as bread, milk, and washing up liquid might seem a little petty, but it’s honestly the best thing to do. The very last thing you want or need is for one of you to feel that you always pay for things while the other gets a free ride. Nope. Download Mint or any other budgeting app and sort out your finances pronto.
Whether it comes to going to the cinema or just buying food for the week, you need to make all the savings that you can. The less you spend as a couple, the less need you will have to argue about your finances. There are a few different ways that you might want to cut back. For one thing, you should obviously follow 10Ways on Facebook because we’re always letting you guys know about the latest deals. You should also make sure that you look for vouchers online and see what’s on there too. The point is that you should always be looking for ways in which you can save money. If you and your partner make this an aim, you should have no problems.
Read: Budgeting Apps
Psst… We all have debts. Whether you’ve got student loans racking up, credit card bills, or an overdraft, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Still, if you’re hiding your debt from your partner, you could be doing the relationship a whole load of harm. It’s nothing short of shady to hide the truth from your boyfriend or girlfriend. If you want to have a secure relationship, you need to be honest about money and the constraints you have. When you’re straightforward about these things, both you and your partner can work together toward dealing with the issue.
Buy: Get Out Of Debt Now
Do you have an emergency fund right now? If one of your loses your job or has some kind of unexpected tax bill come through, it could put a massive strain on your relationship. Having to scrimp when times get tough is never a particularly easy thing to have to do. If you plan ahead for just this problem, you should find that things are way easier. Read about creating an emergency fund here and give it a go. Trust us, when that ‘rainy day’ does finally come, you’ll be ever-so-happy that you started saving before it was too late.
Read: Emergency Funds
Oh, and it’s not just about having one talk about money and being done with it. Nope, you have to stay on top of this area when it comes to your relationship. If you think that there’s tension about your finances, don’t be afraid to sit down and have a proper catch up about it all. It’s healthy to see where you’re both at with this one. People’s opinions on money and the like can change faster than you know, and so this is must for any couple.
Does it feel as though one of you buys more than the other? Do you find yourselves squabbling over small things? If the answer to both of these questions is a big fat yes, you need to figure out a better system. When it comes to the basics (things that you use every day around the home), you should both be spending money. Expecting one person to fork out for these things just is not fair at all.
Now, let’s be honest about one little thing here: There’s one area in which most couples end up overspending like crazy. When it comes to buying gifts for one another, it’s all too tempting to go overboard. After all, you don’t want to look cheap or be in the awkward situation of having spent less than your partner. To avoid just this very issue, you need to set a budget before you start. You might not think that setting a budget for birthdays or Christmas is the most romantic thing ever, but it could save you arguments down the road.
Check out: FireBox for cheap gifts
Finally, here’s one of the most important things you need to remember. Spoiler: Your partner’s money is not your money. Sure, you have mutual things that you need to pay for, but that doesn’t mean that you get to control their budget. Presumably, both you and your partner work hard for your cash. So, you both deserve freedom when it comes to your expendable income. It really is that simple, guys!